Post by damisa on Jan 14, 2007 1:35:18 GMT -5
Because I am a geek...
Do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead? Because we are sending tiny electronic impulses through our skin, into the remote, that will somehow recharge those dang batteries!
Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough money? Because they are evil and of the devil!
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet? Because you can't count the stars, but you can touch the paint!
Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle? <-- someone answered that one already and it sounds good to me!
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection? Something about cruel and unusual punishment. Wouldn't want them to develop an infection...
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? He is follically challanged.
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes? Ummmm.... at a loss here...
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white? Ummmm.... at a loss here...
Is there ever a day that mattress' are not on sale? Nope! The world is still sleep-deprived, so they are trying to help one sale at a time.
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? Because one is never too old for the fridge fairy, even if you have outgrown the tooth fairy.
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance? Because we paid so darned much for the damned vaccuum that we have to give it another chance to actually work properly!
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try? Because evil people created them...
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures? MAGIC!
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?" 'Cos our mamas raised us right.
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over? Murphy's law! And the other thing is usually breakable while the thing you are catching is not!
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat? Ya got me there!
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes? Because its the MIL that usually overshadows the FIL.
The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons are suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you
Do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead? Because we are sending tiny electronic impulses through our skin, into the remote, that will somehow recharge those dang batteries!
Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough money? Because they are evil and of the devil!
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet? Because you can't count the stars, but you can touch the paint!
Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle? <-- someone answered that one already and it sounds good to me!
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection? Something about cruel and unusual punishment. Wouldn't want them to develop an infection...
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? He is follically challanged.
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes? Ummmm.... at a loss here...
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white? Ummmm.... at a loss here...
Is there ever a day that mattress' are not on sale? Nope! The world is still sleep-deprived, so they are trying to help one sale at a time.
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? Because one is never too old for the fridge fairy, even if you have outgrown the tooth fairy.
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance? Because we paid so darned much for the damned vaccuum that we have to give it another chance to actually work properly!
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try? Because evil people created them...
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures? MAGIC!
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?" 'Cos our mamas raised us right.
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over? Murphy's law! And the other thing is usually breakable while the thing you are catching is not!
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat? Ya got me there!
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes? Because its the MIL that usually overshadows the FIL.
The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons are suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you